How to Get Away With Grocery Shopping

When I first started working at the Chiropractic office, I joked with Jen (the office manager) that I was worried people would judge what I had in my shopping cart. Later that day, I actually saw her at the store and jokingly hid my cart from her (it did have some delicious cookies in it).

Because Haines is a small town, there are good odds you'll see someone you know in the grocery store. Most trips take longer than the typical "5 minute run" because you get to say hi to your neighbor.

I thought that this meant that I would have to suffer through people looking in my cart and evaluating what I had. Like, "I heard she tells people to eat cookies on an infrequent basis - why is she buying cookies?"- or "Why is she buying non-organic fruits?"

Essentially, I was concerned that people would judge me for not practicing what I preach. I thought I'd have to send a proxy to do our shopping (Kyle, my husband).

My fears were unfounded. I don't need a proxy. I don't end up buying too many cookies or non-organic produce to begin with, but if I want to (or if the budget works out that way), I have nothing to worry about. No one has come up to me and mocked my cart (for the record, I don't judge anyone else's grocery shopping).

Every once in awhile, when I tell a client that it's okay to eat some of the newly media-demonized foods (wheat, dairy, cereal, etc.), they'll look at me and say "well, if you're skinny and you eat that, it can't be that bad".

I really don't know how to address that. It's not a particular food that's "good" or "bad". It's more about typical eating patterns, or how food choices change when life stressors happen, or what happens when you aren't thinking about what you're eating (typically what happens with emotional eating).

What it isn't about is how healthy someone is based on how they look. My mother has been blogging for two weeks about this concept on Weight Weight Just Love Me. She addresses stereotyping, self-love, snap judgements, and making choices that work for her.

I comment on this blog to talk about health verses appearance, healthy and unhealthy lab values, fat bias, and much more. Through this process, I've gained a deeper understanding of how dangerous judging is. Fear of judgement made me worried to go to the grocery store - but how do other people feel?

Are they concerned about being judged for so many other visible facets of themselves? How do we let people know that we aren't judging them, if public judgement is the norm? How do I assure my patients that I don't harbor fat bias?


Kate Fossman, RDN, LD

October 5, 2015